Ladies, gentlemen, and kids of all ages! Welcome to the Age of Light! We have many inventions created by our ingenious scientists and inventors here for you today. Things once thought impossible to create are now in front of your eyes in a tangible form. Let me assure you that they are 100% safe and foolproof. Now let your imagination wander and see the products of the future!

ENLIGHTHEN YOURSELF!

Since Ms. Pratt does an excellent job of creating new products in the Vision Quest for our enjoyment, here’s yan opportunity to create and share new innovative products made by you.

As I aka The Lone Ranger, from my blog, recently created the Multi-MiniDataPak or (MMDP) to simplify our lives. It’s many functions include calendar, diary, nail clipping (weird…I know), toilet paper (for those who are forever multitasking or rushed), built in sponder, video conferencing, calculator, and much much more. Custom models are available to suit your needs. The only thing I haven’t been able to fix is it’s voice. It’s a cross of Stephan Hawking and Alvin the Chipmunk. Don’t try to imagine it folks…Frankly it’s quite irriating.

Looks like we’ve got our very own Cashton Lock right here.

Hah…I think the only difference between us is he tends to blow up more things then I do…lol.

Yo Snake, cool place to chillax. I didn’t know dis site existed after reading da book. So how ‘bout ya make a VR chamber or something. That would be da shiznitz! Peace bro. I’m gonna figure out dis puzzle thang.

Merf, I see you finally moseyed your lazy behind onto the computer. A VR chamber? I think they have Virtual Reality already in the book. YOu could have a VR for anything, but mainly sports and games.

Guys are guys… – _ -...Just a bunch of lazy couch potatoes. My brother needs to stop talking gangster and focus on college. Invent me something to keep him in one place.

Prez, where’s the rest of the team? From the index I found you and Merf but I haven’t seen Amy, Fel, Emit, or Fox. Wow…A lot to do here..huh..? Better get started.. I’ll check in later.

-River

....And girls are too obsessed with their physique. The rest of the club’s coming. I told them about the site. They just need to take the initiative to get here. Why don’t you send them invites? Get some major XP ^^.

That’s what a belt is for. Belt Merf to the chair and leave him there. Or handcuff him to something. Phaser cuffs are in order.

And I present INSTAFOOD. Food how you like it when you want it. Just one drop of H2O (water) and voila your meal is served. There is an infinite amount of food to offer from apples to a gourmet dinner. You can even cook your own food and put it in the INSTAFOOD shrinker for later use.

Caution: May explode with addition of water. A .000000001% chance that will occur.

Being a string musician, I’ve always hated carrying around more than one instrument to practices and performances. The guitars, violins, violas, etc take up space in my car and are a waste of time and effort to move back and forth. Which is why I invented the Stringformer! It can transform into the general physique of any string instrument. All you need to do is put on the strings and tune it up. No more will you be bogged down with carrying multiple string instruments any more. Also available in Percussion, Brass, Woodwind, Piano, and Exotic models. The ultimate one man band machine!

Hmmm…A portable bathroom. Similar concept to instafood. Use water on the item to enlarge it and do your business then you press a button to make it shrink again. It’s only good for 35 times. The ground must be level and stable when using the facilities. Do not press the button while still in the bathroom. It will cause you to shrink with the tablet and die a horrible death in .2342 seconds.

Ah…Nanobots to repair injuries and damaged organs. Has anyone seen Eureka? It started airing on Sci-Fi since Summer 06. It’s a good show. Anyway, The Nanobots are the new and improved method of curing humans. Now we can live longer and healthier lives. Still working on how to cure diseases. Maybe the Nanobots could be programmed to make the body immune to diseases. Program them with the thousands of alien bacteria signatures and have the body flush them out. New antibodies! Cool.

Hah, I love Eureka. If I remember right the nanobots didn’t extend anyones life, just shortened them a bit. Michael Crichton wrote a book called Prey that was about nanobots, rather interesting read.

I’ll check the book out. Nanobots could extend life. In different stories they have different functions and capabilities. Thanks to Taggart, I got the idea. I can’t wait for Season 3. in the Age of Light personal forcefields exist powered by crystals or solar power. They don’t feed off their biological hosts…Fargo…..lol

• Canister of methane
• Flint
• Steel thread
• Timer
• Metal lever or handle
• Screws
• Jar

Instructions: Self explanatory

Uses: For nasty splicer infestations. Replace methane with ionomine for riders. Extremely nasty business… The blast radius is about 4m. Depends on how much juice you put it in.

I’m currently working on a potion to make a person a splicer for a day. Any takers?

Decontamination Chamber for Infestations. If you have a rider infestation, we’ll dome your house and spray ionomine aerosol in. Wait 5 hours and then spray isoionomine, its isomer, to remove the ionomine from the atmosphere. Finally 4 hours later we will spray our special mix of gases to flush out everything and restore your house to its normal condition. All you need to do is pay the fee and clean up your nasty charred mess.

Peeing Robot Alarm Clock. Remember the old plank with placing someone’s hand in a pan of warm water to make them urinate? Now you can do it to yourself! This alarm clock is 100% guaranteed to train your body to awaken to the alarm or suffer the consequences. The robotic arm will automatically inject a sleeping medicine into your body if you fail to rise 3 minutes after the alarm. Then it will place your hand in warm water. When you wake 4 minutes later from an electric shock you will need to clean your bed and clothes. Also available: Knockout Clock and Supershocker.

• Hamburger Toaster w/cheese capabilities
• 3 Layer Musubi Maker with a rice cooker, nori shaker, and several add ons
• 100 Salad Dressing solution. Pick your dressing and 4 secs later its on your salad

A Drawing pencil that scans your mind and produces the image on paper. Still having problems with the mental scanner. So far it has mind controlled all my subjects, but don’t worry they’re perfectly sane in a different way. I’ll fix it in no time.

I am probably making a fool of myself by posting these weird things, but who cares…lol. I’m human and I prefer to be an idiot rather than a normal one. But what is normality? No one is normal.

I have invented a mind machine that will induce different “true” states of mind. It will make you “truly” normal, sad, happy, crazy, queer, obnoxious, whatever. The human mind is a complex box of distortion from our infinite reactions with everything. So every emotion and thought is rather polluted. We have not discovered the trueness or anything with the pollution in our minds. The only exception is if you have discovered your BAI. If not, well I’m sorry to say you are tainted.

I stole Opsidian’s link and put it here, since it has more relevance. It’s cool. Everyone wants a pair. http://www.medgadget.com/archives/2008/01/electronic_contact_lenses.html